Did you know certain questions you ask yourself raise stress levels in your body, cause anxiety, depression, hopelessness, and a slew of other mental and physical ailments?
Do you pay attention to your Self talk? You know, the conversation you have with your Self in your head all the time? In 1893, Thomas Jay Hudson published his book, The Law of Psychic Phenomena, wherein he wrote, “man has, or appears to have, two minds, each endowed with separate and distinct attributes and powers; each capable, under certain conditions, of independent action.” ( pg.10) Ancient texts show this is not a new concept, yet, here we are in 2018, and still many amongst us remain unaware of our Self Talk and its impact on and influence over our lives.
I remember reading Eckhart Tolle’s, The Power of Now (1997) He describes a moment in his life where he contemplated suicide and asked himself, I cannot live with myself any longer.… And then suddenly I became aware of what a peculiar thought that was. Am I one or two? If I cannot live with myself, there must be two of me: the “I” and the “self” that “I” cannot live with. Maybe…only one of them is real. I love this because it’s the first time I thought, When I say, “I’m going to tell myself something,” who is the “I” and who is the “self” I’m telling? That’s the fundamental question, isn’t it?
Eckhart was 29 years old when he discovered his Self Talk. We may all be aware that we are speaking in our heads, only to understand the power of Self Talk is priceless, and to connect whose words are actually in our head is even more revealing. Have you ever heard your Self asking, “Why did I do that?” emphasising the make wrong? You might have even heard it sounding like your parent! I remember the day my son said to me, “Mom, today I was outside and I heard myself asking “What’s wrong with you?” And, Mom, it wasn’t MY voice, it was Yours!! I wasn’t an enlightened mother when I first began raising my eldest sons. Only, that day, was the last time I ever asked anyone, including mySelf, “What’s wrong with you?”
Certain questions you ask yourself raise stress levels in your body, cause anxiety, depression, and a slew of other mental and physical ailments? Here are five questions to stop asking yourSelf immediately:
1. What did I do wrong? This question causes anxiety in the body and presupposes you have behaved inappropriately.
2. What’s the matter with me? This question encourages self doubt and making oneSelf wrong.
3. Why did I do that? Again, this brings the physical energy of make wrong, reprimanding the Self, not good enough.
4. What’s wrong with me?
5. Why can’t I get it right? ( Variations, Why Can’t I get what I want?)
Asking yourSelf the five questions above limits personal success and personal development. If you are looking to discover yourSelf and the highest version of yourSelf, the one who creates the highest, brightest future possible, and takes you forward on your journey, it’s time to drop those Self deprecating and disempowering questions and learn to replace them with questions that bring a greater awareness of yourSelf; shifting from feelings of isolation, disempowerment, hopelessness, futility, and despair.
Asking healthier questions of one Self introduces you to Self Knowledge. It opens up unlimited possibilities, allows for Self development and transformation. The inside transformation leads to an outward transformation impacting yourSelf and those around you. It is the practice of reflection and renewal. It is the mark of a leader
Here are a few questions you can begin asking yourSelf immediately?
- What would it take to?
- What would I need to know?
- What can I learn that will?
- What can I gain from?
- Who do I have to be in order to?
I’ve intentionally omitted all the ‘How” questions as that is another topic for another day.
This week practice asking yourSelf different questions. See how your Self talk impacts your week and take notes. Make the connection for your Self and feel free to share with me.